Home Improvement Update 08/18/19

Got lots of little essays percolating, but writing those takes time and and thought and quickly begins to resemble actual work. Therefore,

BRICKS!

When we last checked in, way back on July 23, the front planter project looked like this:

Some progress has been made:

The capping bricks along the front are not yet mortared in. I first needed to lay out where the holes go for the upright spikes on the fence. This requires carefully laying out the bricks, numbering them, marking the seams, then marking where the uprights go, so that I can then take the bricks that need cutting, cut them, check them, then stack all the bricks on the ground so that I can mortar them in in the right spots one by one. Only then can I epoxy in the little pieces of angle iron to which the bottom horizontal runner of the fence will be attached, fill the square towers with concrete up to that point, add another 7 rows, add another couple little pieces of angle iron for the top runner – THEN I can attach the fence.

I’ve done this once already, worked out fine. Lot of little detail tasks.

Marks and numbers:

May be a few days before I get to this. Our lovely and beloved younger daughter, Anna Kate, is home for a few days before heading off to South Sudan for a year of missionary work with the Salesians. 22 years old. Kids these days.

Meanwhile, a little progress on the front steps. We left them here:

Doesn’t look like much, and it isn’t really, but today we’re here:

Got the rebar epoxied in; cut and shaped a piece of round stock for the bottom hinge – a very simple post through a hole style; got a corner piece for the rain spout, which will help guide exactly where I put the bricks. This little square tower is critical, as the gate will hang on it – must be sturdy and exact. There will be, again, little pieces of angle iron with holes for the hinge rod and the rebar, to tie it all together so little kids won’t destroy the gate when they (inevitably) swing on it.

I’m holding off a bit on epoxying stuff until I’ve got a bunch to do, so I’m not opening and closing the tube of industrial epoxy mix (works like a caulking gun, only with two internal tubes that must be mixed) and thereby wasting the stuff. I’ll do the brackets on the front planter and the hinge on this tower at one time.

For your possible amusement: we had 3 old coolers, each with various issues: the hinges on the big one broke off, and the little drain plug went missing; a handle broke on another, and a crack developed in a third. After pricing replacements, decided to throw the cracked one away and repair the other two so they are at least useable.

Have I mentioned I tend strongly to overthink and over do things? I replaced the handle on the smaller one with a piece of broomstick with a hole drilled through it lengthwise (1) tied to the cooler with a length of heavy nylon cord – well and good. Then came replacing the little plug on the larger one.

The lost original was a plastic cap that screwed on. Now, you may be thinking, as I was after 5 minutes of trying other solutions: how about getting a piece of cork, shoving it in there, and calling it a day? I have in my shed a little drawer full of various sized corks. Entire process would take maybe 60 seconds, if I sauntered my way through it. I eventually did just that:

But no. The above fix took place maybe 20 minutes after I had started trying other solutions, and 15 minutes after the smarter part of my brain started whispering, then yelling: just get a cork, you schmuck!

We’re talking washers, expansion bolts, butterfly nuts, plumber’s tape, futzing with pliers and power drills and looking through a couple dozen little drawers with bits and pieces of plumbing hardware and nuts and bolts, none of which worked even a little…

And then I put a cork in it.

On the garden front, God is maybe trying to tell me something. Might be something simple like: plant in good soil with plenty of sun and water and far from any walnut roots. But I’m thinking it might be more complicated. For this year, a number of surprising things happened in the garden.

A little background: I grew up in Southern California, land of the long, perfect growing season, son of a man who grew up on a farm. When I was 12, we moved to a house with enough land attached that Dad cleared a nice area, had a truckload of manure delivered, and we put in a vegetable garden.

My childhood memories of gardening are that you plant stuff, make sure you don’t forget to water it, and you get more vegetables than you can use. And tomato worms.(2) Easy-peasy.

About 27 years ago, we rented a house with an overgrown dump of a backyard. I thought: garden! and put in a ton of work clearing and tilling a nice chunk of it. Beneath the dead grass and weeds, the soil was iffy – closer to the house, it showed signs of having been worked at some point in the not too distant past; the farther out you got, the harder the clay.

Thus began 27 years of gardening frustration. In Northern California, while the weather is still very good, nothing from my childhood seemed to work. I added manure. I watered and watered. I fertilized (which we never did when I was a kid). We’d get some stuff some years, but never anything like what we got when I was a kid. Our house where we’ve lived now for 23 years has rock-hard clay soil and a couple huge walnut trees in the back. The only way we get anything is planting in planters, and that only sort of works.

Until this year:

Two of 4 cantaloupes on a volunteer vine in the front planter, along with one of 8 nice butternut squash on another volunteer vine.
A few of the couple dozen large tomatoes on one of two plant in the front.
One of 5 and counting sugar pumpkins.
Scale is hard to get here, but that’s a large and growing giant pumpkin, heading toward 100+ lbs (we hope)

And there’s some peppers and sweet potatoes, along with a lot of fruit from the fruit trees. The backyard stuff in planters is disappointing as usual (although we’re getting a few melons and some nice peppers) but the front yard in-the-ground stuff is a flashback to childhood! Woohoo!

So: I lost my job 14 months ago; my wife quit her (modestly salaried) school job in June. We’re both trying to get some home stuff taken care of before hitting the job hunting trail. Yet this is the year of the fairly epic garden and orchard. Like I said, not sure what if anything this means.

  1. If you’re wondering, I drilled a hole freehand the length of the handle, coming at it from both ends and meeting in the middle. Got lucky – the holes met up exactly. I mention this because if the Universe wants me to stop doing stupid things like this, which had probably under a 20% chance of working, I need to fail the *first* time I try. Otherwise, flush with success, I’ll keep doing stupid things, thinking they’ll work. Ya know?
  2. My little brothers and I were greatly amused when we showed the dog the tomato worms. They’d spit at him, he’d eat them. He’d have green whiskers the rest of the day.

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Author: Joseph Moore

Enough with the smarty-pants Dante quote. Just some opinionated blogger dude.

5 thoughts on “Home Improvement Update 08/18/19”

  1. My father grew up on a subsistence farm during the Depression, so we had a garden as long as we had a backyard big enough for one. I remember that gardening in America must have taken a significant turn in the mid 70s though, because I was visiting from college one spring weekend and ran an errand with him to the local Kroger store. He returned to the car with the observation, “I can’t believe it, they’re actually selling horse shit at a grocery store.”

    1. My dad was also a Depression kid, but was already 13 when it hit. Up to that point, I got the impression things were not quite desperate – his father had a huge spread, thousands of acres, in Oklahoma, and owned some land in town – until the Depression wiped him out. Be that as it may, I do know dad wanted nothing to do with farming. I think the garden was throwing a bone to my mom, who liked growing things. I was the only kid who showed much interest.

      Don’t remember hearing anything from dad about having to pay for cow manure,. but he seemed to be a true believer in the stuff. nd we had beautiful plants and lawns…

  2. I am utterly boggled after moving to Iowa.

    My daughter bought a petunia that had one, half-dead flower on it.

    It was 25c, so why not.

    ….. it is now six times the size, has at least a dozen blossoms, and is STILL BOOMING. Six months later.

    And the marigolds are blooming, too.

    Whiskey tango?

    1. Cool! I remember hearing stories about how you can hear the corn grow in Iowa – that, in the summer, especially after a rainstorm, the field would crack and pop. Nothing like heat, sun, good soil and water to make (most) plants happy.

      The difference is, I think, that in a couple months, everything in Iowa will be dead, while here we’ll be getting rain and all the hills will be turning green. A lot of summer vegetables – tomatoes, cucumbers, peppers – will keep going until November. That actually seems normal to me. Weird.

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