Lemurs and Science!

Let’s get back to the serious business of making fun of Science! headlines:

Are these dwarf lemurs the key to long-distance space travel?

No. Unless they have developed warp drive out in the jungles of Madagascar somewhere (and we all know it’s penguins that do that sort of stuff) it bloody unlikely that lemurs are the key to long distance space travel.

However, they are So. Darn. Cute. Look:

Assuming of course that you take your cute with ’50s bulgy SciFi alien death eyes.

Nope, turns out that, more important than facility with delusional hyper-drive pseudo-science, these lemurs can – ready for it? – sleep real good. Hibernate, even. And, they are primates! That means they’re just like us, except shorter, fuzzier and with those creepy death eyes. So, it should be EASY, CHILD’S PLAY to:

1. modify humans so that they can hibernate – genetic engineering, brain surgery, mind melds, whatever, don’t be a pedant;

2. extend that food-and-potty-break-free hibernation for years on end, instead of just a few months – hey, we’ve already cracked open the skull in step 1, how hard can this be?;

3. create massive interstellar spacecraft within which our newly-enhanced super-sleepers can crash – oops, poor choice of words, there – can *slumber* while meandering their way to Alpha Centari over the course of a couple decades or more.  Solar sails! Nuclear powered asteroid with vaporized rock drive! LOTS of rocket fuel! SOMETHING will work!

But lemur hibernation – that’s *the* key to long distance space travel.

But they are cute. Nightmareishly cute:



Author: Joseph Moore

Enough with the smarty-pants Dante quote. Just some opinionated blogger dude.

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